What would be different this time?
by chesney924
Summary: Post the shooting, Cristina is dealing with a range of emotions. Owen wants her another chance, but can he show her that things will be different moving forward. Fluffy oneshot about my favorite ship.


**What would be different this time? **

Cristina pulled another tissue from the box sat in front of her, and once again wiped the tears that she could not stop from falling down her face. She was supposed to be tough, a robot, but those that truly knew Cristina Yang, knew that she felt things immensely, and that was often why she cut herself off.

One day had made a lifetime worth of difference. A day during which Owen could not tell her that he loved her and not Teddy, a day during which she was going to be a godmother, and then she wasn't, and she had held her friend, while she sobbed for her lost child. It had been a day from hell, she thought, and surely she was allowed a little self pity, a moment to let all the emotion that she had held in escape, a moment alone in the peace and quiet of her own apartment.

Gary Clarke had killed seventeen people, six nurses, four security officers, two surgical residents, one Dr on a Psyche consult; you had to appreciate the irony of that one, a medical secretary, and three hospital orderlies. Cristina, although she knew most by sight and name, was not really friendly with any of the victims, but this did not help her feel better. Cristina had always been very vocal about her dislike and distrust of the Mercy Westers, and she felt guilty because she had never really given Reed Adams or Charles Percy a chance, and now it was too late, they were both lying in the hospital morgue, and her time to get to know them had gone. She reached for another tissue, as a further bout of sobs racked her body.

Poor Meredith, she was worried sick about her husband, and was hurting over the loss of her baby, and although Cristina had tried to comfort her, she needed to share her grief with her husband, and she couldn't, because he was not stable enough to hear the news. Cristina felt helpless, she could not help her person in what she was going through, she could not make amends with Reed and Charles, and she could not take back the words she had said to Owen earlier in the day, when she had told him that she was through, they were through.

Cristina tried to focus on the positive things that had happened that day, as a way of trying to internally talk herself out from under the dark cloud. Firstly, she had completed a complicated cardio surgery successfully, and had managed to save McDreamy's life into the bargain. Gary Clarke had not killed her, although the fact that he had held a gun to her head at all was not as positive and Jackson Avery had turned out to be quite an ally. He had shown faith in her when he had suggested that she was the one able to complete the surgery, and had saved hers and Owens life with his quick thinking, by disconnecting Derek's heart monitor. Perhaps she would allow her anti MW policy to exclude Jackson from now on. It was with this thought in her head that she got up to get herself a drink. She wanted vodka, but thought in her emotional state it was best to keep off the hard stuff, after the state she had got into following Bambi's death; she knew that getting drunk would not help, although she decided to allow herself a glass of wine.

Cristina was sipping her wine, when she heard the door. Although she didn't feel like visitors, she had been made aware that the police may need to speak to her again, so ignoring the door was not an option. Reluctantly she got up and opened the door, and was somewhat surprised to see Owen standing in the threshold. "Hi," he said. "Can I come in?"

Cristina stepped back and opened the door wider to let him through.

"I thought that they were keeping you in for observation." said Cristina.

"They wanted to, but I didn't want to stay, and frankly I don't think that anyone was in the mood to argue with me." replied Owen "Besides, I was worried about you. When you didn't come to see me, I wanted to come and make sure that you were ok." he added.

"I'm fine, what about you?" she countered.

"I err I am an ass." he said "I need you to know, that I know that I am an idiot, but if you will have me, I am your idiot."

"Owen, I meant what I said. We have been in and out of this relationship for best part of two years, and if you had to think about whether it is me or Teddy you love, that is not good enough for me." explained Cristina.

"I know I am not good enough for you, I never have been, but I do love you. I didn't want to hurt Teddy, because I care about her, and I didn't want to come between you and your mentor, I was trying to find a solution where everyone would win, I just didn't realise how hard that would be." said Owen. He was looking at Cristina, trying to gage her feelings, but she was not really giving anything away, so Owen continued talking.

"When I left the hospital with my patient, and realised that you were still inside, I couldn't get back inside fast enough. I didn't care what happened to me as long as I found you and you were ok." finished Owen

"I was relieved when I heard your voice in the OR." admitted Cristina. "I knew I couldn't stop, but didn't know how long he was going to let me carry on before he pulled the trigger. I fully expected to die in that OR today." said Cristina. Owen felt himself go pale; he needed to try not to think about what could have happened. They were both alive, that was the important thing.

"If you had," he replied, "I would have died too, because I can't live without you. Please give me another chance."

"What would be different this time Owen, because to be fair, from pretty much the moment I met you, I have known how I felt about you. I haven't had feelings for anyone else, why are you suddenly confident that your indecision is over with." asked Cristina.

"I have been caught up in lots of extreme situations, and they have a way of giving your life clarity. Today was one of the most extreme situations anyone would come across, and I knew, with crystal clarity, that if it cost me my life, I had to find you, and tell you how I felt about you, because if either one of us had died today, our last conversation would have been you breaking up with me, and I couldn't let that be the last thing that you said to me." Owen moved forward and with his one functional arm, reached out to hold Cristina's arm. Cristina stood still, that was a good sign, he thought.

"You didn't answer my question, how is your arm?" asked Cristina

"I'll live. Hopefully I will get full mobility back, but I'll be fine. If I have you I will be fine. Do I have you Cristina?" Owen asked.

"Last chance Owen, I mean It." said Cristina. Owen smiled he was so relived to hear her say that.

Cristina moved towards Owen and held him, "You need to stop doing this Owen, I can't cope with It." whispered Cristina into his neck.

"I promise you my 100% undivided attention." Owen replied, dropping a kiss onto the top of Cristina's head.

Cristina laughed. "That is not what I mean, any more messing me around, and you are a dead man, I mean the saviour complex, you know throwing yourself in front of guns."

"Well that was not planned; I just knew I needed to get into that OR, and the rest I sort of improvised. I just knew that I couldn't let him shoot you or Meredith. Besides, Avery told me it gave him a diversion, so that he could move the heart monitor." Owen smiled smugly.

"Just when I had decided to be nicer to Jackson, on account of him saving my life, he has to go and piss me off again, by justifying your caveman instincts." Cristina responded dryly. Owen was still smiling. He had won her back, she was going to give him another chance, and this time he would not blow it. Ignoring the sarcasm of her words, Owen lifted her chin, and moved forward to kiss her. Cristina immediately put both arms around his neck, pulling him towards her to deepen the kiss, and this caused Owen to flinch. Cristina immediately withdrew.

"I'm so sorry, did I hurt your shoulder." she apologised

"Cristina I am fine, now come back here and kiss me." he demanded. Cristina, uncharacteristically, did as she was told.

Much later, lying in bed, Cristina asked, "So do you still want us to move in together?"

"Kind of." replied Owen

"Kind of?" questioned Cristina, feeling slightly upset that he seemed less sure about their future than he had a few days ago

"Yes, I want us to live together, but I want you to marry me too. What do you say?" Owen asked sitting up, to make eye contact with her, again trying to read her thoughts.

Cristina pushed him gently back onto his pillow, and straddling him, moved in for a passionate kiss before saying "So that is what is going to be different this time."

"I'm going to take that as a yes." Owen replied smugly before pulling her down for another kiss.


End file.
